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y_unjin

y_unjin

Kpop Fan
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Never-Bong
so idk if my friends are true friends like my besties , were like a quadrio idk how to call it nd i feel like since they can talk to each other over text nd i cant they js do everything w/o me. i feel left out but whenever i mention it i feel like nobody would care or they would be like aww were so sorry and go back to whatever theyre doing. they call every single day and it gets so...ugh bcs like, im your friend too?? theres this one who js got added (lets call her h) h has been very close with my other two friends..(lets call them q and r.) i feel like everyone js listens to r vent now and i feel like r has been taking control of the friend grp. they also have some of the same classes which i dont have and they always have to mention it in like every single convo. why? idk. i js always feel like im there... and even when i try to talk to them no. they ignore me. i feel like theyre not true friends but whenever i become frnds with some1 else it feels like cheating... idk. only q is supportive still h and r have been like only interacting w the friends i brought into the group now. i feel betrayed sad angry mad guilty and i dont know what to feel.
i dont have any self confidence. even one of my new frnds shes very supportive lets call her c she doesnt believe me when i say i dont like my things. i rlly dont, and idk why she thinks im lying. and then i always compare myself to others but i dont tell anybody so evry1 ig js assumes since i have better grades that im js confident. but no i tried something then stopped i need to try everything to lose weight but i have just been doing NOTHING. im unmotivated but im overweight. its too hard to stay upbeat when u have nothing to keep you upbeat but acting can be my superpower. i have to be always happy for evry1, have to put on masks of confidence that i couldnt truly afford. then i feel bad for not having self confidence when others have gone through way worse and are going through it. its hard to do things like this but i need to stay happy :(
soo even though my parents can be like rlly nice i do truly love them they can also be extremely mean. like r ( my bestie ) complains abt her parents forgetting abt her fav food or smth and then i get jealous bcs my parents can lit be like 100x worse and then i get guilty cs ik a lot of ppl have it worse. a lot of conflicting emotions. and then what my parents do is like i would forget to do one thing and do a lot of other things, stuff they would like rlly want and ik that, they would yell bcs i forgot to do the one thing. then skip over all the rest. i have family drama (that im not going to share) and they think that since im young(er) that nothing is to stress me out and the rest of the family / their drama is all that matters. i try to look from all perspectives ive went to a counselor but the counselor didnt do much and i fail to look from all perspectives . my parents yell at me for not being a picture perfect daughter and i try to make that happen with a lot of things but itll never be enough for them. never. idk when theyll be happy. also theyre kinda not open to liberal-ness they think their culture is the best and like kpop and lgbtq+ stuff is nonsense, so i cant say i like the things i like bcs theyll laugh at me for ages. my family also laughs at me for crying and says it doesnt do anything. idk what to do anymore to be perfectly honest and theyre so picky i cant win. but ill stay happy bcs at least i have parents.. i have thought abt h4rming myself and my parents would just... maybe they would love that. so that they wont have to deal w me anymore.
 
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iiserene

iiserene

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Cute Elephant
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Yeonjun
y_unjin said:
so idk if my friends are true friends like my besties , were like a quadrio idk how to call it nd i feel like since they can talk to each other over text nd i cant they js do everything w/o me. i feel left out but whenever i mention it i feel like nobody would care or they would be like aww were so sorry and go back to whatever theyre doing. they call every single day and it gets so...ugh bcs like, im your friend too?? theres this one who js got added (lets call her h) h has been very close with my other two friends..(lets call them q and r.) i feel like everyone js listens to r vent now and i feel like r has been taking control of the friend grp. they also have some of the same classes which i dont have and they always have to mention it in like every single convo. why? idk. i js always feel like im there... and even when i try to talk to them no. they ignore me. i feel like theyre not true friends but whenever i become frnds with some1 else it feels like cheating... idk. only q is supportive still h and r have been like only interacting w the friends i brought into the group now. i feel betrayed sad angry mad guilty and i dont know what to feel.
Click to expand...
this stinks im sorry
as someone whos in a trio, and I'm always the "left out" friend or the one that isn't included in their "duo"
ik what this feels like
 
S𝝤𝝦𝝜𝝞✫

S𝝤𝝦𝝜𝝞✫

You bleed just to know your alive
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Kyungmin
Youngjae
Hyein
Riwoo
i miss talking to that one girl she was my bsf (on here) why did I fvck it all up I miss her I miss being her friend I h8te myself
 
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