𝕯𝖔𝖓'𝖙 𝕵𝖚𝖉𝖌𝖊 𝕸𝖊_SkzHyunjin[Fanfic]

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리자~

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your heart *dies from cringe*
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(I really miss him jxbxjdjd )

16fbc5048cff71d90531da8b37a95060a38a0134r1-2000-2000v2_00_mh1620077300338.jpg

You and Sam (Jinie's English name) are dating for a long time.
Everything is great!
You have a relationship that everyone loves to have.

ff2fc3e6883e2cbfdc4912f84f2a9145.jpg

But like the other couples, both of you have ups and downs.
Of course, there is no such thing as a perfect relationship.

Sometimes you cried Even though both of you love each other.
There are some differences between you guys that cause misunderstanding and stuff like that.
But that doesn't stop you from loving each other.
Love still wins! Both of you still manage to get through it all^^

72a431c5d614d302e05ad6a33925abc0.jpg

------

But then... The nightmare that you fear the most happens:
You don't know how, why and what is the reason.
He suddenly becomes cold and always pretends to be busy.
It's hard to believe that he suddenly becomes like a different person.

You always caught him talking with someone on the phone.
So you can't help but doubt him.
You're scared to lose him

You're stressed out and keep getting anxious.
So you convinced him that talk this out.


————

Y/N's POV


" What's wrong with you? Did I do something wrong?? Why are you treating me like this.." I asked trying hard not to cry


"What do you mean?" Sam said while not paying too much attention to me and just continue playing.


"Look at me"


"I'm playing, can we talk about this later?" He said (Doesn't care)


He's always like this when I want to talk with him

Annoyed, I turn off the computer.

"Hey—" Sam look at me


"Answer me." You said looking directly at him


b9188ebb76454340c713a8e4232a4e90_mr1620070061302.jpg

Hyunjin sigh deeply but didn't say anything.



"Why did you suddenly become like this...
I just...can't understand it c'mon stop messing with me... I—" I was interrupted by him




" Why don't we..." Sam looks at me coldly




"End this relationship."


It's like my heart skip a bit when I heard that.

Wait..maybe I'm dreaming...
I should wake up now... But—
Why does everything feel so real?
Am I going crazy?
Sam wouldn't say such thing as that
Yes hahaha, he wouldn't...


We are dating for 5 years already... Why would he—

My vision starts to blur and I feel like my strength drained

"Oh—? " I feel my tears falling

No... No... This is just a nightmare
Yes. Wake up... Y/n...


"Sorry." Sam can't even look at me in the eyes and left me.



I can't breathe... What the heck did just happened?
My breathing becomes faster and faster and my tears keep falling.


*phone starts ringing*

—Liane (Y/N's Friend)—

I cover my ears, it's too noisy... And hyunjin words keep echoing in my head


My vision gets darker and my body feels light.


.
.
.
.


That's when I lose my consciousness



It's all dark... All I can see is myself in the middle of darkness


"Y/n." I heard someone called my name


Who's that...

I look around everywhere until
I look up.



I saw Sam on a cliff, his hands are tied and then, I saw mom behind him



"Y/n!!!" I was horrified when my friend lianne suddenly pushed him

And Sam falls


When he's about to hit the ground
My eyes wide open



"Y/n!" My friend Liane hugs me tight while crying "I knew it, something's wrong with you, I'm glad I came here"

"W-what happened??"

"I don't know, I just saw you laying on the floor! I thought you're dead" She sob " you scared me..*


I try to remember what happened, but it makes my head hurts.

"Btw, where's Sam? He said he'll come over today right??" liane asked


"Hyunjin.... "


*Memory flashbacks*


So it's not a dream after all.....
I hug Liane tightly and cry really hard


" oh my... Y/n what's wrong???"


I didn't answer and just continue to cry my heart out.


Liane pat my back gently and stay silent

"Let it out, I'm here.. I'm not gonna leave you hm? " Liane said with a soothing voice.



—————



After that day, Y/N decided to stay at home so she can take a rest.

She's not ready to face Sam so it's the best thing she can do


---


||` End of prologue
 
Last edited:

리자~

Kpop Fan
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Messages
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Location
your heart *dies from cringe*
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||`Chapter 1: Bitter smiles


Y/N's POV

I must attend our class today.
Because of our upcoming final examination.
At first, I don't want to but I really have to.
I have no choice...


I avoid every entrance and place that Sam usually goes to.
I didn't even go to the cafeteria to eat lunch.


I go to the school rooftop so I can be alone
The wind is so relaxing
The silence gives me a soothing feeling
I need this...

After a few minutes, my peacetime was interrupted when I heard someone.


"Senior Sam!"


I saw a girl wave at sam.
Sam looked at her and smile

37eb3c735f94f2a123c9bde645fff758_mh1620321980153.jpg

"Wow, you bought a lot of food, are you gonna eat that by yourself??" The girl walks closer to sam


"Ah.." He suddenly laughs awkwardly


"Ohh is that for someone else??"

"Y-yeah.."

"Who is it??? "

Both of them talk casually...
Who is she?..


"*laugh awkwardly again* Here, have some"

"Oh thank you " the girl smiles sweetly


The girl suddenly whispers something to him that made him smile weirdly


What the heck...
I feel weird, my emotion mixed up.


I walk away and didn't notice that my tears are falling...


What the heck was that?
Did he... Find someone else...?
Is that why... He's like that...
Is it because of that girl??





——

(This is the scene after the prologue, but in this case. It's our jimmie's POV)

Sam's point of view


Sh** I messed up... What the heck did I do...
It's all my fault. I made her cry... I break her heart...
The scene keeps repeating on my mind like crazy..
All of it is so vivid...


"What happened to Ms.Y/N?"


I snapped back to reality


Everyone turns their heads in me.


I don't know... I...


"Sam, do you know what happened to her??" Our professor asked me


My hands start shaking... I feel awful
I'm ashamed of myself....
Everyone is waiting for my answer.
Some look at me weirdly.


Don't look at me...
I don't know...
Why does it feel like I lose my voice?..


"Hmm... It seems like he doesn't have any idea, that's alright. I'll take care of it later." Our prof sighed and continue our discussion

My hands feels sweaty and cold...
This is so distracting...


—Time skip

Our class ended, I walk alone on the street
But this empty street feels so empty.
After waking up from the dream that was you.
This morning of reality feels so empty...


I don't know where I am going..
It's getting dark..
I don't really know what to do now.
Just realizing how dumb I was for doing that.


I didn’t even thank her in the end...
I Just left her behind with sharp words in a trembling voice.
Even if I act like everything is fine, I can’t lie...
This longing is making me regret it all
I must have really lost my mind.



'You should...s҈t҈a҈y҈ a҈w҈a҈y҈ f҈r҈o҈m҈ h҈e҈r҈.' I heard that voice again...
That voice that makes me do this..
That voice...




Why did I listen to it...



The voice in my head is getting louder.
It's driving me crazy...


Stop... STOP


'Y/N'


'Y҈o҈u҈ d҈o҈n҈t҈ d҈e҈s҈e҈r҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈.'


'L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈'


'L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈.'


'L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈!!'


I fell to the ground covering my ears
But the voice didn't stop.

I try to get up even if my body feels very weak.
I try to keep my balance so I lean on the tree.


'y҈o҈u҈ a҈l҈w҈a҈y҈s҈ h҈u҈r҈t҈ h҈e҈r҈. A҈r҈e҈n҈t҈ y҈o҈u҈ a҈s҈h҈a҈m҈e҈d҈ o҈f҈ t҈o҈u҈r҈s҈e҈l҈f҈.'


I said stop...


It's getting hard to breathe...


Somebody.... Please .....


.
.
.
.
.
.

"Sam..?"




The voices stops when I heard someone...



______



Lucy's(Yeji English name) POV



I was so stressed out because of the upcoming exam.
So, I decided to get some fresh air.
Everything is so exhausting.


I visit my favorite place in seokchon lake.
It's pretty late that time so only a few people are hanging out.

e873c99dacade4aaf9f6c02ebda45a75_mr1620327813775.jpg

I sigh deeply as I stroll around.
But then, suddenly I heard someone crying.

I look around but it seems like I'm the only person left there.

Oh, fudge. It's a boy's voice...

No, no don't show up in front of me, please
I will pray for your soul I promise but please don't show up


I was horrified and was about to run.


But then, I saw someone leaning on the tree


Wait... Is that...


"Sam... ?"


Eh....he's....crying...

images - 2021-05-04T025138.107_mh1620067974580.jpg

" I mean— Senior* Sam! Are you ok???" I walk closer to him

He steps back a little bit and covers his face with his cap

a54249e88b2f6b57b0a115e9266a7282_mh1620068254210.jpg

" h-hey, uh it's late why are you still here?? " senior Sam asked " Did you come here alone? At this time? " he added


"Uhm yes, but I'm actually about to go home"



Awkward silence**





"Oh... I-I see, I'll walk you home then"


"Uh senior sam I'm fine, thank you.."


"Really?.."


I nodded after that, awkwardness filled the air again.



" Can you.." Senior Sam pauses for a minute "Can you pretend that you didn't see what happened earlier?" He looks away


"Uh, of course, yeah... " I laugh awkwardly


"Ah... Thank you..."

"But Senior Sam... Are you sure you're ok??"

Senior Sam look at me like it's panicking... Well Idk.. his face is hard to read..

"A-ah! I'm sorry, I won't ask anything again, I'm just.."

He sits on the ground still leaning on the tree.

"Actually.." He hesitates but continues what he is about to say "I'm... not.." He looks up in the sky


When you look at his eyes, you can see how deep and sad he is
The moonlight shines on him.
It's like a scene in the movies... He looks so handsome like a protagonist... But he looking at him... You'll know that he's in so much pain right now..
It makes me want to hug him tight


"Senior sam—" I sat beside him


"Ahh just call me Sam and talk casually, it's fine since it's just the two of us here"

"Oh..ok..s-sam " I smile awkwardly

"To be honest, I'm embarrassed because you saw me crying... "

"Eh? Why?? It's ok, it's normal to cry tho"

"I'm a man you know... Everyone who sees that will laugh at me, I look weak."

"No seni-I mean Sam, no matter if you're a man or a woman, crying doesn't make you look weak. It's ok! Cry as much as you want all of us feel tired. It's normal. Let go of your emotion" I said and look in at the moon


Sam remains silent, and just watch the moon

"Whatever you've gone through, or whoever you've long for. Yes, I don't know anything.
But I can feel you... I know you're older than me, but it doesn't matter.
You can trust me... I guarantee you that! Promise!"


Sam looks at her and chuckled.


"Thank you... But for now, I want to keep this to myself, thanks again, I feel much better now."


I smiled at him


This is my first time talking to him
My first time to see him cry
My first time being this close to him.
But I feel comfortable


"Lucy right?"


"How did you know my name??"

Whattttt

"You're popular "-Hyunjin

"Ah no I'm not, you are! "

Sam laughs and keeps denying it
Though he is indeed very popular in our university.

That's why his nickname was 'Prince'.

----

This is how our friendship started.
It's one of the most happiest and deep memories I had with him


_______ the next day**


Sam's POV


It's a normal empty day for me
I saw Lucy on my way to our classroom.
She looks very cheerful today.


----- Before our class start, I heard someone talking about Y/N.

"Yeah I saw her too, she looks stress"

"I wonder what happened"

Wait..





She's here?




She's back....



I stand up and head out even if our class was about to start.

I sneak in the hallway and find her classroom

——

When I arrive I peek in their room and find her.

.
.
.
.

images - 2021-05-07T032254.180_mr1620329087395.jpg

I feel relive when I saw her




She looks very distracted...
I wonder ... If she's feeling well ....
I'm... Sorry...y/n...



Now all I can do is watch her from afar.


'Y҈o҈u҈ a҈r҈e҈ t҈h҈e҈ w҈o҈r҈s҈t҈! Y҈o҈u҈ d҈o҈n҈t҈ d҈e҈s҈e҈r҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈!'


The voice....it's here again...
Maybe I should go—


"* clear his throat* Mr. Sam Hwang. What are doing here? It's class hours." Ms.Ma look at me suspiciously


Shp! I got caught—
Think Sam...think...


*Ting!*


"Argh Ms.Ma I'm sorry, I have diarrhea, so I'm not feeling well" I act like my stomach still hurts


" Oh dear, you should have told me! Are you ok now?" She looks very worried


"No...argh.."


Please fall for it Ms.Ma

.
.
.


She looks at me for a minutes


"Let's go to the clinic, take some medicine!"

I sigh in relief.

Phew, that was close...
You did well Sam

images - 2021-05-07T033938.647.jpeg


———Lunchtime


They let me go back when I told them I'm ok now.

I secretly check Y/N classroom to see if she's still there

But I didn't see her.

Maybe she's in the cafeteria with Liane...


———

I come to the cafeteria right away but I only saw Liane


I avoid her but I overheard something


"Liane where's Y/N?"


"Uhm... I don't know... She said she doesn't want to eat and wants to be alone..."

"Ah what happened to her??"

"Sorry... I can't tell you"

"Ehh whyyy"

Liane shrugs


---

When Liane and the other girl left, I immediately bought y/N's favorite foods

I'll leave this on her desk so I have to hurry up
I don't want someone to see me




"Senior Sam!"




I saw a Lucy waving at me

Ah no... I'll be late

"Wow, you bought a lot of food, are you gonna eat that by yourself??" She asked while moving toward me


"Ah.." I laughed awkwardly

I need to hurry

"Ohh is that for someone else??"

"Y-yeah.."

"Who is it??? "

Sorry, Lucy but not now...


"*laugh awkwardly again* Here, have some"

"Oh thank you " Lucy smile


I was about to say goodbye but then she suddenly leans closer to me


" Whoever is that girl she's the luckiest!" She whispered to me



I don't know how to react, so I just smile..?

Only if you know how terrible and shameful I am.. You wouldn't say that...

She doesn't deserve someone like me...



I look at the snack I bought for her.




I hate this feeling... It's ...killing me..



||`Chapter 1 ended



Sorry if I have a lot of grammatical errors (╥﹏╥) Thank you so much for reading, sorry chapter 1 was delayed
I can't stop procrastinating 😭😭👈
 
Last edited:

skzlvr

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Member
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Messages
488
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Hanse
I Am Who
||`Chapter 1: Bitter smiles


Y/N's POV

I must attend our class today.
Because of our upcoming final examination.
At first, I don't want to but I really have to.
I have no choice...


I avoid every entrance and place that Sam usually goes to.
I didn't even go to the cafeteria to eat lunch.


I go to the school rooftop so I can be alone
The wind is so relaxing
The silence gives me a soothing feeling
I need this...

After a few minutes, my peacetime was interrupted when I heard someone.


"Senior Sam!"


I saw a girl wave at sam.
Sam looked at her and smile

View attachment 53121

"Wow, you bought a lot of food, are you gonna eat that by yourself??" The girl walks closer to sam


"Ah.." He suddenly laughs awkwardly


"Ohh is that for someone else??"

"Y-yeah.."

"Who is it??? "

Both of them talk casually...
Who is she?..


"*laugh awkwardly again* Here, have some"

"Oh thank you " the girl smiles sweetly


The girl suddenly whispers something to him that made him smile weirdly


What the heck...
I feel weird, my emotion mixed up.


I walk away and didn't notice that my tears are falling...


What the heck was that?
Did he... Find someone else...?
Is that why... He's like that...
Is it because of that girl??





——

(This is the scene after the prologue, but in this case. It's our jimmie's POV)

Sam's point of view


Sh** I messed up... What the heck did I do...
It's all my fault. I made her cry... I break her heart...


"What happened to Ms.Y/N?"


I snapped back to reality


Everyone turns their heads in me.


I don't know... I...


"Sam, do you know what happened to her??" Our professor asked me


My hands start shaking... I feel awful
I'm ashamed of myself.


Everyone is waiting for my answer.
Some look at me weirdly


Don't look at me...
I don't know...
Why does it feel like I lose my voice?..

"Hmm... It seems like he doesn't have any idea, that's alright. I'll take care of it later." Our prof sighed and continue our discussion


—Time skip

Our class ended, I walk alone on the street
But this empty street feels so empty.
After waking up from the dream that was you
This morning of reality feels so empty...


I don't know where my feet lead me
I don't really know what to do now.
Just realizing how dumb I was for doing that.


I didn’t even thank you in the end
Just left behind sharp words in a trembling voice
Even if I act like everything is fine, I can’t lie
About this longing making me regret it all


I must have really lost my mind.


'You should...' I heard that voice again...


That voice that makes me do this.

That voice... Why did I listen to it...


The voice in my head is getting louder.
It's driving me crazy...


Stop... STOP


'Y/N'


'Y҈o҈u҈ d҈o҈n҈t҈ d҈e҈s҈e҈r҈c҈e҈ h҈e҈d҈.'


'L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈'


'L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈.'


'l҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈!!'


I fell to the ground covering my ears
But the voice didn't stop.

I try to get up even it feels like my body feels very weak


I try to keep my balance so I lean on the tree


'y҈o҈u҈ a҈l҈w҈a҈y҈s҈ h҈u҈r҈t҈ h҈e҈r҈. A҈r҈e҈n҈t҈ y҈o҈u҈ a҈s҈h҈a҈m҈e҈d҈ o҈f҈ t҈o҈u҈r҈s҈e҈l҈f҈.'


I said stop...

It's getting hard to breathe.


——


"Sam..?"


The voices stops when I heard someone...


______


Lucy's POV

I was so stressed out because of the upcoming exam.
So, I decided to get some fresh air.
Everything is so exhausting.


I visit my favorite place in seokchon lake.
It's pretty late that time so only a few people are hanging out.

View attachment 53122

I sigh deeply as I stroll around.
But then, suddenly I heard someone crying.

I look around but it seems like I'm the only person left there.

Oh, fudge. It's a boy's voice...

No, no don't show up in front of me, please
I will pray for your soul I promise but please don't show up


I was horrified and was about to run.


But then, I saw someone leaning on the tree


Wait... Is that...


"Sam... ?"


Eh....he's....crying...

View attachment 53123

" I mean— Senior* Sam! Are you ok???" I walk closer to him

He steps back a little bit and covers his face with his cap

View attachment 53124

" h-hey, uh it's late why are you still here?? " senior Sam asked " Did you come here alone? At this time? " he added


"Uhm yes, but I'm actually about to go home"



Awkward silence**





"Oh... I-I see, I'll walk you home then"


"Uh senior sam I'm fine, thank you.."


"Really?.."


I nodded after that, awkwardness filled the air again.



" can you.." Senior Sam pauses for a minute "Can you pretend that you didn't see what happened earlier?" He looks away


"Uh, of course, yeah... " I laugh awkwardly

"Ah... Thank you..."

"But senior Sam... Are you sure you're ok??"

Senior Sam look at me like it's panicking or smth

"A-ah! I'm sorry senior sam I won't ask anything again, I'm just.."

He sits on the ground still leaning on the tree.

"Actually.." He hesitates but continues what he is about to say "I'm... not.." He looks up in the sky


When you look at his eyes, you can see how deep and sad he is
The moonlight shines on him.

It's like a scene in the movies... He looks so handsome like a protagonist... But he looks like he's in so much pain
It makes me want to hug him tight


"Senior sam—" I sat beside him


"Ahh just call me Sam and talk casually, it's fine since it's just the two of us here"

"Oh..ok..s-sam " I smile awkwardly

"To be honest, I'm embarrassed because you saw me crying... "

"Eh? Why?? It's ok, it's normal to cry tho"

"I'm a man you know... Everyone who sees that will laugh at me, I look weak."

"No seni-I mean Sam, no matter if you're a man or a woman, crying doesn't make you look weak. It's ok! Cry as much as you want all of us feel tired. It's normal. Let go of your emotion" I said and look in at the moon


Sam remains silent, and just watch the moon

"Whatever you've got through, or whoever you've long for. Yes, I don't know anything.
But I can feel what you're feeling... I know you're older than me, but it doesn't matter.
You can trust me with this... I guarantee you that! Promise!"


Sam looks at her and chuckled.

"Thank you... But for now, I want to keep this to myself, thanks again, I feel much better now."

I smile at him


This is my first time talking to him
My first time to see him cry
My first time being this close to him.
But I feel comfortable

"Lucy right?"

"How did you know my name??"

Whattttt

"You're popular "

"Ah no I'm not, you are! "

Sam laughs and keeps denying it
Though he is indeed very popular in our university.


----

This is how our friendship started.
It's one of the most happiest and tough memories I had with him


_______ the next day**


Sam's POV


It's a normal empty day for me
I saw Lucy on my way to our classroom.
She looks very cheerful today


----- before our class start, I heard someone talking about Y/N

"Yeah I saw her too, she looks stress"

"I wonder what happened"


She's here?


I stand up and head out even if our class was about to start.

I sneak in the hallway and find her classroom


When I arrive I peek in their room and find her.

.
.
.
.

View attachment 53125

I feel relive when I saw her
It seems like she's distracted...

I'm... Sorry...
Now all I can do is watch her from afar.

'Y҈o҈u҈ a҈r҈e҈ t҈h҈e҈ w҈o҈r҈s҈t҈! Y҈o҈u҈ d҈o҈n҈t҈ d҈e҈s҈e҈r҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈!'

The voice....it's here again...
Maybe I should go—


"* clear his throat* Mr. Sam Hwang. What are doing here? It's class hours." Ms.Ma look at me suspiciously


Shp! I got caught



Think Sam...think...


*Ting!*


"Argh Ms.Ma I'm sorry, I have diarrhea, so I'm not feeling well" I act like my stomach still hurts


" Oh dear, you should have told me! Are you ok now?"


"No...argh.."

Please fall for it Ms.Ma

She looks at me for a minute


"Let's go to the clinic, take some medicine!"

I sigh in relief.

Phew, that was closeYou did well Sam

View attachment 53126


———Lunchtime


They let me go back when I told them I'm ok now.

I secretly check Y/N classroom to see if she's still there

But I didn't see her.

Maybe she's in the cafeteria with Liane...


———

I come to the cafeteria right away but I only saw Liane


I avoid her but I overheard something


"Liane where's Y/N?"


"Uhm... I don't know... She said she doesn't want to eat and wants to be alone..."

"Ah what happened to her??"

"Sorry... I can't tell you"

"Ehh whyyy"

Liane shrugs


---

When Liane and the other girl left, I immediately bought y/N's favorite foods

I'll leave this on her desk so I have to hurry up
I don't want someone to see me




"Senior Sam!"


I saw a Lucy waving at me

Ah no... I'll be late

"Wow, you bought a lot of food, are you gonna eat that by yourself??" She asked while moving toward me


"Ah.." I laughed awkwardly

I need to hurry

"Ohh is that for someone else??"

"Y-yeah.."

"Who is it??? "

Sorry, Lucy but not now...


"*laugh awkwardly again* Here, have some"

"Oh thank you " Lucy smile


I was about to say goodbye but then she suddenly leans closer to me


" Whoever is that girl she's the luckiest!" She whispered to me



I don't know how to react, so I just smile..?

Only if you know how terrible and shameful I am.. You wouldn't say that...

She doesn't deserve someone like me...



I look at the snack I bought for her.




I hate this feeling...



||`Chapter 1 ended



Sorry if I have a lot of grammatical errors (╥﹏╥) Thank you so much for reading, sorry chapter 1 was delayed
I can't stop procrastinating 😭😭👈
IM INVESTED IN THIS PLEASE PM ME OR RESPOND TO THIS WHEN U MAKE A PART TWO!!
 

리자~

Kpop Fan
Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2019
Messages
210
Age
18
Location
your heart *dies from cringe*
Credits
7,245
||` Chapter 2: Dying inside


Y/N's POV


After I calm myself I got back to our classroom.


Ha..right now...
I want to go home...
I don't like it here...

And...I can't stop thinking about what happened earlier...


Who's that girl?...
What is her relationship with him?
No... I'm sure they are just seniors and juniors..right?
But that girl... She's so beautiful...
What if...


"Ms.Y/n"


No, maybe I'm just overthinking...
And besides... He already broke up with me.

I should—



"Ms. Y/n! "


I was startled by our teacher.
Everyone is looking at me.
some are trying to hide their laughter..maybe I look crazy...
Some are looking at me with worries.


"I've been calling you, but it seems like you can't hear me." The teacher said


"I-I'm sorry Mr.Goo.."


Argh...this is embarrassing...


"Ms.Y/N, are you really ok?? What happened to you??" Mr.Goo looks worried


"Uhm..p-personal problem..." I did some 90° degree bow "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't let this affect my studies... I will try my best to go back on track" I said still doing it


Mr.goo let out a sigh.


"Stand properly, go back to your sit. We don't know what kind of problem you've been going through, but I hope you'll be fine soon.." Mr.goo smile at me a Lil bit

"Thank you Mr.goo..."


I really need to focus...



Tick tock tick-tock***



—Le Time skip

The class is over.
I told Liane that I want to walk alone
She insists but she can't do anything about it.
I just need some time alone this time...



"Just tell me who gave you all those snacks and give me some." I heard a familiar voice


Oh.. it's...


"Oh—Y/N Noona!" Jeongin wave at me cheerfully

images - 2021-05-07T073645.107_mr1620344551867.jpg

Who's that girl?...

461e74aa4b2261416818d1fc9b0bde4d_mr1620344497229.jpg

"Hello "The girl next to Jeongin greet me politely

Her voice is also familiar...
I think I saw her before...


But where...

"Ah Noona, this is my friend, Lucy. She's older than me but it doesn't matter because I'm taller than her"


"Psh " the girl named Lucy makes a bitter reaction


I saw the snacks she's holding.



Wait...





Those snacks are...


.
.
.
.


I remember now...
She's that girl earlier...
I can't help but feel annoyed.


"You." I look at her


Lucy looks at me, she looks a bit confused.
"Uhm yes?? " She asked looking so innocent

It makes me more annoyed

What the heck.


"Leave him alone. " I said coldly


Her face becomes even more confused.

"Pardon?"


"Y/N noona, what's wrong?" Jeongin looks confused too


"Stop acting like you're innocent. " I said looking at her


"I'm sorry, but.. May I know who's 'Him' are you talking about..?" she asked politely


"S—" I paused


Wait... What am I doing??
What the heck am I saying...
No... I shouldn't have said that.


"S-Sorry." I dash away


What the heck...
I messed up again...
I shouldn't let that happened.
I'm sure they will think I'm crazy and...



ARGHHHH

——


Lucy's POV


What...just happened..?


"Uh... Did you do something wrong??" Jeongin asked me


"I don't know... it's... My first time talking to her tho" I'm still confused by now


"Argh just give me one of your snacks c'mon! Sharing is caring!" Jeongin said

"Fine fine. Here" I gave him the choco milk.


"Yey thank you hehe" Jeongin drinks it like a 5year old child "but...Y/N noona acts strange lately... I wonder who's 'him' is she talking about"


Yeah... She's kinda weird...


"Hmmm... Maybe Y/n noona is going crazy because she quarrels with Hyung again" He shrugs


"Who's Hyung are you talking about?" I asked


"Psh I didn't know you're not updated" Jeongin chuckles "anyways, you don't need to know." Jeongin starts to walking away "Let's go"


"Whatt? Just tell me, I'll keep it a secret" I said, I'm just really curious...


"Nope"


"I'll treat you if you tell me"

"Nah I'm good"

"Jeonginnn"

"Give 20 million won"

"What the— no way!"

"Ok"

"Just tell meeeee, hey!"


———


Sam's POV


(Scene after the last part of chapter 1)

Maybe... I should stop...


I... Already broke up with her.

Oh yeah, I think I'm going insane.
Why would I give this to her? For what?

Screenshot_2021-05-07-09-03-52-64_mr1620349510746.jpg

"Sam... Are you ok??"


"Hmm? Ahh sorry. What is it?"


"Ah no, it's ok. Is there something bothering you??" Lucy asked


"Nothing" I forced a smile


*Lunch breaks end bell ringing**


"What?Already?" Lucy looks at me "Hurry! you have to give that to her now " she said


"Ah, this.." I look at the snacks I bought again.
"Forget it. Here take it"


"W-What!? Nooo, don't give up sam! You can still—"


"You don't want it?? It's fine... I'll just throw it"

I was about to throw the snacks but Lucy stops me

"Wait what!? No! That's even crazier! Don't waste it!" Lucy said

"But you don't want it. "

"Fine fine ill take it!" Lucy said at snatch the snacks.

"I'm going. See you? Good luck." I said then walk away



'What's wrong with him...' I heard Lucy muttered



---- Time skip



I went home right away.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
It's like I'm not in the mood.
I don't feel like doing anything.
I just... Well, I don't know what I want.


Ahh, seriously...
what's the heck is wrong with me.

819f7c9601903ea7cb08bffde660dd0e.jpg

I close my eyes...


but even if my eyes are close


I can still see her...

328bb69434282267fa62428993de5f44.jpg


I knew that the pain I felt now was here to stay. In many forms. Through many nights.


"L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈ h҈e҈r҈. S҈h҈e҈ d҈o҈n҈t҈ d҈e҈s҈e҈r҈v҈e҈ to҈ be҈ t҈r҈e҈a҈t҈e҈d҈ l҈I҈k҈e҈ t҈his҈"

"J҈u҈s҈t҈ d҈o҈ w҈h҈a҈t҈ we҈ s҈a҈y҈."'

"Go҈ a҈w҈a҈y҈."



These voices... haunt me every single time...

"When will you go away... I did it already! What else do you want me to do!? Tell me!"I clench my fist


The voices suddenly turn into laughter.


" Stop! Stop laughing at me! " I punched the wall


Still, the laughter didn't stop


No...stop...


My left fist is bleeding.
But I feel nothing...
Hah. I'm numb now huh.

I slowly walk into the kitchen and find a knife.


"This... is this what you want me to do? " I laugh with them "sure. Let's end this."


I point the knife at myself and close my eyes.

.
.
.
.


"Are you sure you won't regret it?"



That voice...




I felt so weak as the laughter is slowly fading.


I dropped the knife and fall to the floor.


*phone's ringing*


I'm...tired.



I reach my pocket and saw who's calling me.
I answer it trying hard to sound like I'm fine.


"Son..."


Hearing her voice makes me very weak.

"Mom.." My voice almost cracks but luckily she doesn't seem to notice it


" oh, my son... How are you?.. Are doing alright? "


I can't... My voice will probably crack now.
I can't let mom be worried about me.


It's hard...


"Jinie, when mom gets better I will make your favorite dish. So wait until I recover ok? oh You should come and visit me again with Y/n" my mom said


Her voice is soothing.
But it makes me weak.
I can't stop my tears from falling...

"Jinie, Why are you not saying anything?? Are you ok??"

I can't... I need to do something..


-------


I just text her while she's calling


['Sorry Mom, I have a sore throat it's hard to speak. But I'm getting better so don't worry ]I texted her


"Oh- I received a text! It's from my jinie" my mom laughed "oh dear. Medicine? Are sure you're alright?? Ahh, Jinie I'm sorry mom can't take care of you... I'm such a burden... "


[What, no mom you're not. I'm fine, don't worry. Just continue on your recovery. I'll be fine I promise.] I texted her again


"Ah, my jinie has grown up a lot. Mom is really happy I hope I can still see my grandchildren(s)"


Mom...


" oh wait, how's Y/N??"


I don't know what to say... So it took me so long to answer...


I made up another lie again...


"Ohh she's doing good? You should take good care of her ok son? We owe them a lot..."

oh yeah....

"Y/N is such a perfect girl. My son is so lucky" my mom said with a happy tone


That's why I don't deserve her...



I'm sorry to disappoint you mom...



Your son is terrible. Y/n should marry someone who wasn't like me.

"Jinie, whatever happens. Mom loves you ok? I'll hang up now. Take care my son..:)" My mom has to rest so she ends the call.

After that call...
I sighed deeply and just let myself sleep on the floor.



It's hard... I don't know now...
I can't di3 yet... Mom... She wants to see me when she recovers... I have to...

Stay alive.



||` Chapter 2 ends



It's pretty short, but still... hope you like it?
I'm not a good writer (╥﹏╥)
Thanks for reading!
 
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리자~

Kpop Fan
Member
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Messages
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Age
18
Location
your heart *dies from cringe*
Credits
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||` Chapter 3: complicated



Sam's POV


"Argh.."


My head hurts...
I look around and realized that I'm in my room already...
As far as I can remember...
I fall asleep on the floor.

images - 2021-05-07T115950.859_mh1620360170784.jpg

Both of my hands hurt..especially my left hand... It feels uncomforta—

"What the... Bandage"

I look at my clothes too and saw that it is now different as well.


Maybe this is a dream???

Wait. I heard someone cooking in my kitchen...

It smells good... Don't tell me it's...




"Y/N..."




"Oh—Good you're awake"


"What the- Chan Hyung— What are you doing here??"

images - 2021-05-07T121627.220.jpeg


"Ah let's talk about it later, go wash face. Let's eat brekkie" Hyung sat and wait for me


After I wash my face, I sat in the chair in front of him.

images - 2021-05-07T120113.572_mr1620360552198.jpg

"So Hyung... What are you doing here?? I feel like someone invaded my privacy and I don't have one anymore" I said then starts to eat

"What are you saying, we usually do this in each other," Hyung said

"My clothes..."

"Oh yeah I changed it for you mate, don't worry about it," Hyung said then smile while giving me a thumbs up

images - 2021-05-07T133248.425_mh1620365660878.jpg

"Hyung— 😐"

" I already wash it too since there's blood in it." He said then his expression changes


Awkward silence**

After he mentions that, we remain silent until we're done eating.


"Hm. So... Tell me. What's going on?" He crossed his arms which makes him looks scarier

a0672461179a4e7aab26c3033cdc9006.jpg

"Nothing...."


"After you missed my 5 calls I come here right away. And I was right. Something happened. " he said then look at me seriously " What are you trying to do. I saw a knife on the floor and Your left hand is bleeding too much. You didn't tell us anything about this." He added


"Be honest. What's going on Hyunjin?.." He looks at me intensely


"Hyung... "



Why is it hard to open up?..


I can feel my hands start trembling...


Chan Hyung pat my shoulders and smile at me

As if he's telling me that it's ok, I can trust him..calm down...

"Y/n... And I..."

Hyung listens carefully


"We broke up.."


"What..?" Hyung was surprised and can't speak for a minute

"I have my reasons...it's not like what y'all think...I just can't tell it now...give me some time.."


Chan Hyung looks at me for a few minutes, then sighed


"Alright... "






———

Y/N's POV


Liane invites me to a coffee shop, she said she wants to cheer me up.
And since there's no class tomorrow, I accept it.

"Y/N! Over here!" Liane wave at me

I approach her and sit on the other side


"The coffee here is so unbelievable! You should try it. Then, while we are enjoying our coffee. I'll tell you about some crazy stuff!" Liane looks really excited

When our order arrived she starts talking nonstop.
About their vacation and her uncle who likes to do some crazy stuff and ends up being arrested, but he's fine. He is released after a few days.

"So last week, my uncle dance WAP in front of the police officer! Hahaha, that was hilarious! Seriously, luckily he is release after 24hrs" while Liane was laughing so hard
Her phone starts to ring


"Oh it's my aunt," she said then asked her aunt why did she call her


———


"Oh, shoot uncle is arrested again!"


"Oh, why???"


" My uncle is drunk, he danced completely naked in front of the police station ! I need to hurry I'm sorry " Liane said


"No no it's ok, hope everything goes well"

"Yeah I hope so too, text me when you're finally home ok?? I'm sorry y/n..."


I smile and wave bye to her.

I finish my coffee and was about to leave when a puppy suddenly approaches me.


Aww, it's so cute!!
I start petting the puppy
She's so kind and friendly
Let me stay here for a while




———


Sam's POV


Chan Hyung wants to have some coffee, so he invites me because he said it feels lonely when he's the only one enjoying it.


"Oh wait here, I'll just get our order," he said

24b98eab411acd87b1f354a854cdd137_mh1620379155158.jpg

I look around a little, I explore the whole coffee shop


It's not bad tho, I hope their iced americano is good here.


*arf! Arf!*



Hmm. I find where that bark came from...


I heard familiar sweet chuckles along with the puppy barks


It's right here...


"Awww you're so cute! But it's getting late... I have to go"

89f02feedcda1eeab41bfe8627fee72f_mh1620377264538.jpg

"That's.."

.
.
.
.
.

'Y/n'


d05cdeed576b8314325ea4d93809de3b.jpg


"Are you sad?? That's alright! You should go to your owner now" she pinches the dog cheeks softly


I can't help but smile
She looks like a 5-year-old girl


"Oh, there you are. What are—" I covered chan hyung's mouth


I'm glad she didn't notice us...


"Whds dhd(who's that)" Hyung peek and is surprise to see y/n


"Y/n is here?..!"-chan


"Shh" I watch her quietly


Hyung looks at me and smiles.


" I knew it." He mumbles


She gets up and is ready to leave
So we immediately hide and pretend to be a normal customer.


" Why don't you tell her the truth??"Chan hyung asked with a clam & low voice


"What do you mean?" I observe her and slowly follow her

"I'm pretty sure you know what I mean..." He said " wait are gonna follow her??"

"Yeah, I need to make sure she'll get home safe."


Hyung smiles softly and pat my back


"Wait, let me come with you" Chan bring our coffees with him


———while following y/n


"So why don't you tell her the truth?(2)"


"I just can't...and I don't think she needs to know..." I said while my eyes are focus on her


"I think she needs to know at least. It's hard on her part too, knowing that you leave her without telling the reason why... " Hyung said


Silence*...


He's right... But I think the truth is too much for her... I mean..argh... I can't.



Just knowing that...



"L҈e҈a҈v҈e҈r҈ h҈e҈r҈."



It's here again... The voices.


I stopped walking.


"Hyung can I ask a favor??"


"Hmm?"


"Tonight, make sure she'll get home safely"


"I thought you're —"


"Sorry Hyung... "


The voices inside my head keep getting louder


"A-alright, take care. Wait for me, I'll cook for you once I'm done here" chan said and continue to follow y/n

"O-ok thanks.." I said

I have to distract myself

What should I do?..
How...?
How can I stop this?
I'm tired of hearing this voices...
What should I—


*BEEEEP*


images - 2021-05-09T194332.065.jpeg

———


Chan's POV


I proceed on following Y/N secretly.


While I was following her, There's a lot of thoughts running in my mind that keeps bothering me...


It's obvious that Sam still loves her, so is Y/N... Like....why do they have to do this?

What's the reason?.. Argh

It's not even my problem but I can't stop thinking of it.

Only if Sam tells me the reason.
Ahh...He didn't even tell me what happened...
I hate the fact that I know that there's an enormous problem between them... Yet, I can't do anything to help them...


———

Hmm??

I suddenly realize that this is not the way to her apartment.


Wait, where is she going? It's late now...


ee05eeb669a142d84640140f806336d3.jpg


———

Wait..this place ...I still remember this..

Whoa,it's been a long time since I visit this place


What will she do here??at this time..


She goes to the playground and sits on the swing.
She looks so drained...


*phones ringing**


Oh sh—is it my phone-

I almost freak out, I can't find my phone—!


.
.
.
.
.

*ringing stops*



"Hello?"- Y/N


Oh... I sigh in relief


I'm glad it's not my phone.. haa...



" Y-yes I'm home now.." She said


Hm...what...


"Why did you call me mom?? " she said


(Are you ok??) -her mom


"I'm..ok... Yeah I'm doing good"


( You sound like you're tired... Maybe you're stressing yourself again, I heard that you have an upcoming exam)

"No, I'm fine. There's nothing to be worried about"

(Hm, alright... Don't be too hard on yourself ok?? Btw, how's Sam?? )

I can see that she's trying not to cry ...
And with her mom's question, she seems surprised when she heard his name


"Mom, I need to study now, I'll just call you tomorrow," she said trying to avoid her mom's question

(Oh ok, take care Y/N, mom loves you so much^^ tell me if you have a problem... I'm here)

"Thank you, mom...I love you too.."


*call ended*


I can hear everything since it's too quiet here...



*Sobs*




I sit behind the tree where I was hiding...



....



I can hear her sobbing


It hurts. I never saw her cry before...
Y/n is a strong, cheerful, and beautiful girl...
Seeing her cry is like... Well, I can't explain it...


It's hard to listen it...
I don't want to see someone crying...
Maybe I should call herm??
No, I can't just do that... Argh, I didn't know...


"How can they do that..?" Y/N voice is cracking


"How can anyone just love someone and just... Walk away like nothing ever happened?
How can they act normally like—argh" Y/n kick the small rock near the swing


"How... How can you do that...
How can you be ok with that!?"



I don't know what to react nor say.
But y/n I don't think he's fine.
He's just exactly like you...
It's hard for him...

—I remember Sam laying in the floor with blood in his hands...
Even if he's asleep, his tears are falling while mumbling y/n's name—


I clench my teeth..


"I tried! And I keep on trying...
I try not to miss you
I try to let go... But in the end... " she pauses

.
.
.
.
.

"You're always on my mind... " she said with a weak voice

———

She calms down after a few minutes and decided to go home.

I'm so worried about her...
She looks bewildered..
Good thing she's safe...
I hope she gets better...

———


Maybe I'll call her later once I got home...
But I don't know what to say.
Should I ask Liane to do it instead?

Well—


I don't know...




Haa... This is crazy...


I wonder if Sam got home safely...


——
Sorry delayed again 😬
You probably know why right?(╥﹏╥)
I'll edit this tomorrow :'>

—StillProcrastinatingಥ‿ಥ
 
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리자~

Kpop Fan
Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2019
Messages
210
Age
18
Location
your heart *dies from cringe*
Credits
7,245
||` Chapter 4: unforgettable


(Still)

Chan's POV


Ahh, I feel uneasy...
I don't know
Maybe I should take a bath?
Lol, what am I saying—

Oh yeah, I will cook for Sam tonight.
I should call him


I call him and he picked it up immediately.


Oh, maybe he's already hungry. I'm sure he'll tell me to hurry up


images - 2021-05-16T005810.370.jpeg

"Oi—"


"Hello!? I— are you sam's mother?friend?brother?—p- pls.. Sam is* inaudible* pls..pls hurry " I heard a voice of a

" wait? What?? Calm down where are you??"

I hear the siren coming from the ambulance

Argh, I feel bad about this... What happened...


I don't care who is calling right now, I need to see him

I feel very anxious.


"*crying* we're on our way to the hospital, please... Please hurry come here... I don't know what to do—" the girl said while crying


I'm worried about the girl too, her voice is shaking...


Is it someone he knows?

" Can you give me the address of the hospital??"


"It's XXXXXX Hospital..." She can't stop crying


" I'm coming, just calm down, he'll be alright, I'll see you later ok? Wait for me " I said with a calm voice need to hurry now.


"Yes please...thank you"

*call ended**


Sam's POV


images - 2021-05-16T002232.853_mh1621095876865.jpg


I regret it all...




It was all my fault...



.

.

.

.

so why am I hurting?...




——


I don't know where I am right now...



It's dark...



.
.
.
.

The view suddenly changes...


This...


I still remember this place...


This is where I first met her



I look around, trying to find someone...




Who??



Of course... It's her.



"Y/n..."




I saw her sitting peacefully while reading her book.

d6404fd5455036b9eccdaee065d3545b.jpg



"Hm?" She turned around and look at me


She smiles at me


That smile... I miss it so much.


And... I want to see it again.



The scenery changes again


It's night... Around 7-8 pm?..


Everything... I still remember it.


This is where we celebrate our 5th anniversary... Our last celebration together.

L
"Sam! Sam! Look at the moon! It's all mine!"She chuckles

IMG_20210507_161526.jpg


She resembles the moon that illuminates the black sky.


"Sam? Are you ok?? " she frowns, feeling worried

But I think... Your light becoming overshadowed by my darkness.



Fireworks explode in the sky***

images - 2021-05-16T002814.871.jpeg


"Whoa... Look it's beautiful!" She smiles


You're shining like a fireworks in my sad empty town...


"Blooming under a cold moon, we are like fireworks... Rising, shining, and finally scattering and fading. So until that moment comes when we vanish like fireworks... Lets us sparkle brightly, Always." (TK)


The scene is getting blurry and darker.

L҉e҉a҉v҉e҉ h҉e҉r҉."

No... the voices again...


"Sam?" y/n look at me worriedly


No, Don't fade away...


I can't see her face now

It's like I'm getting blind...



Stop....Not yet...


No!


.
.
.
.



It's all dark...



I can't see...



Where is she?.


Why am I alone... again...


.
.
.


.




"Sam..." I heard someone calling my name while crying


Y/n??


Is that you??


It's too dark, I can't see anything...
What's going on?.



————

I hear sirens from the ambulance.


.

.

.

.

.




I slowly open my eyes...




Where am I?..



I saw my hand, someone is holding it very tight... She's trembling.


"He's awake!" The person wearing medical clothes said and starts checking me


"Sam!"



I look beside me without turning my head too much since it's too heavy



There I saw...



.

.

.

.

.

.





"Y/n.."...

———

Lucy's POV


"Lucyyy~ thank you for coming to my birthday!" Chaeryeongsaid happily

images - 2021-05-10T101229.284.jpeg

"Thank you for inviting me, I have fun!" I said and smile

"Oh here take this mini cake with you," she said and hand me the small cute box

"Oh no, I'm fine—"

"Pleaseee, just take it we still have a lot of cake here! Oh, and it's strawberry shortcake!" She said

"Alright alright thank you, Chaer!!" I smile and hug her "I'm going now"


"Wait ill ask our driver to take you home —"

"What no, I'm really fine, my house is near here too so... Yeah but thanks"


She thinks for a few minutes and then gives up

"Alright take care ok?? "


"I will, thanks!"


———


Wow that was amazing
Chaer is so lucky!

While I was walking thinking of how fun it is
I saw someone familiar on the side of the street


It's him


I run towards him while waving


He looks sick... Is he alright??
He looks very pale.


"Senior Sam—!"



*BEEEEEPP*



He was hit by a car.


——

"Sis!—!" My brother screams as he pushed me away, he's trying to save me from the car that was about to crash on me



*CRASH*

images - 2021-05-13T212800.468_mh1620912690804.jpg


——


No... This can't be happening...


I witnessed the same accident again...


I—



I start trembling


I walk closer to where Sam is.


Every step feels heavy and it makes me weak.


The people around gather and the driver also came out. They are checking Sam

"I already call the ambulance!" -someone

"Excuse me I'm a doctor! I'll take care of this please step aside—" the guy said and check if he's still breathing


*Sam's phone ringing*

The doctor gets it in his pocket and checks it

"Please someone answers this, it can be one of his relatives. Please tell them his current situation." The doctor said

The doctor give it to me and get back on track

I breathe deeply.

I can't—

I feel heavy, I don't know what to do—


I start to break down and cry


Sam needs help right now!



I answer it immediately.



"Oi—"

Please!

"H-Hello!? I— are you sam's mother?friend?brother?—p- pls.. Sam — ah there's an accident! pls..pls hurry" I said clenching my hands

Screenshot_2021-05-10-09-54-47-98_mr1620612017682.jpg

I heard the ambulance sirens from afar.



———after the call



The doctors and nurses are assisting Sam inside.


"C-can I come?? I- Im his friend-"


They look at each other.


Then, they agree because the ambulance is about to leave.


Inside the ambulance*


Sam is still unconscious...


I hope he's fine... Please...


I hold his hands tight.
It's cold...
I look at him.


Sam.. Please...


The clock is ticking.

I feel very anxious.



———



"Ok he's stable this time, but we still need to hurry so we can examine him thoroughly"


THANK GOD!

I'm still holding his hands tight.

You'll be fine...

"We're almost there," the other nurse said

"Get ready."

They nodded




"You'll be fine.." I muttered as I close my eyes






.

.

.

.

.



I feel like his finger moves a little.


Is it just me?? Or—


"H-He's awake!" The nurse said and start checking him again


"Sam-!"


His tired/weak eyes look at me.


"Sam... Just wait..you'll be fine now ok?"


He's trying to speak but it seems like he's having a hard time


"It's ok... I'll talk to you when you're —"



"Js@- .." He mumbled



What...?


What is he trying to say?..


"We're here! Hurry!" The doctor said


They open the door immediately and lead Sam Inside the hospital


I'm trying to catch up with them and hold his hands tight telling him that everything will be fine.
The nurse stops me when they finally reach the ER.

images - 2021-05-16T005226.984.jpeg


I sit on the bench outside, still feeling anxious



So yeah this is so short, I'm sorry jsnxjd
I know, it's ok if you'll hate me for posting late :<
I hate myself too lol
But I get sick these past few days and got grounded : )

Btw, I'm really really really sorry...
 
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