(EVERGLOW) Mia x *character i made up*

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najingter

when the flowers bloom beautifully and turned red
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Leeseo
Mia
Liz
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specifically, the person i worked with.
thinking about her and the cute way she was rooted there and blushing like mad when i gave her the octopus had my heart trembling so hard and sparks running through my blood.

the bolded words dont really make sense that much maybe fix it
no its actually a phrase
 

sanasideup

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when you write dialogue (conversation, talking, etc.) you have to make a new paragraph every time someone new speaks. so, for example, liz might say something. emie responds to it. emie's response should be in a new paragraph. it just makes the writing flow better, and easier to read! :D
 

najingter

when the flowers bloom beautifully and turned red
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when you write dialogue (conversation, talking, etc.) you have to make a new paragraph every time someone new speaks. so, for example, liz might say something. emie responds to it. emie's response should be in a new paragraph. it just makes the writing flow better, and easier to read! :D
could u give an example? i'm not used to writing like that, bc the only writing ive ever done are my english essays :0
 

sanasideup

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could u give an example? i'm not used to writing like that, bc the only writing ive ever done are my english essays :0
Ofc! I love English, so I'm always glad to help!

"Have you seen my coat?" I asked Rena.

"No," she said. "Is it in your room?"

I shrugged. "I don't know, I didn't check."

She raised a brow at me. "Don't you think that'd be a good place to start?"
 

najingter

when the flowers bloom beautifully and turned red
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Mia
Liz
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chapter 4
mia pov
i'm pretty sure that i had never blushed more in my life.
because someone, a very beautiful, slender, muscular someone, sitting opposite me, everytime i looked up, i blushed. it came to the point where i was just a tomato the whole time because i couldn't stop blushing.

onda pov
what on earth was wrong with eunji? she was SO red! she'd never, ever blushed this much before, even her ears were red! to be honest, se looked kinda cute...AAARGH! you pabo! mia is straight, not gay! she'll never get together with you! i wondered how it would be like if she ever blushed because of me. my heart would melt at once!

mia blushed again, a deeper red, if possible, and i felt i had to question her about it.
i sent a text to her, and she followed me to the back of the shop, confusion clear on her face.
"yah, what's wrong? are you sick?" i asked, worried.

she blushed more, which seemed to tell me she was sick. i was correct.

"ah...y-yes, i am a little sick." eunji answered, fanning herself.

"should we go back? i feel like going back anyways, it'll be no big deal." i cut her off as she tried to protest.

"a-ah, no! i'll be fine. if you want to go back, you can go."
a cute cat smile appeared, obviously trying to appease me. she only smiled at me like that when she wanted to appease me. but when she appeased (or tried to) me, i knew something wasn't right. i decided to leave the matter there, and ask jiwon-unnie to help me.

"ok, see you later."


"jiwon-unnie! i need help!" i called as i went through the front door. she met me in the kitchen, listening to my story. a small grin appeared on her face when i finished.

"do you REALLY not know why she was like that? tell me, honestly." she smirked.

"no! i really don't know! why are you smirking?" the smirk just made me even more confused. huh??? what was going on???

"it's alright, i'll talk to her for you."

"thanks, then." i replied, still feeling very confused.


mia pov
after a very nice afternoon with liz and emie, manager kim took me back home. i was flushed, hot and bothered, but happy.
when i got in, jiwon was waiting at the door for me, an unreadable look on her face.

"omo! w-what's wrong?" the blush fading, my eyebrows creasing in confusion.​
 

Xena

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i cant find anything wrong with it , you have improved!! but i might check later again to make sure.
chapter 4
mia pov
i'm pretty sure that i had never blushed more in my life.
because someone, a very beautiful, slender, muscular someone, sitting opposite me, everytime i looked up, i blushed. it came to the point where i was just a tomato the whole time because i couldn't stop blushing.

onda pov
what on earth was wrong with eunji? she was SO red! she'd never, ever blushed this much before, even her ears were red! to be honest, se looked kinda cute...AAARGH! you pabo! mia is straight, not gay! she'll never get together with you! i wondered how it would be like if she ever blushed because of me. my heart would melt at once!

mia blushed again, a deeper red, if possible, and i felt i had to question her about it.
i sent a text to her, and she followed me to the back of the shop, confusion clear on her face.
"yah, what's wrong? are you sick?" i asked, worried.

she blushed more, which seemed to tell me she was sick. i was correct.

"ah...y-yes, i am a little sick." eunji answered, fanning herself.

"should we go back? i feel like going back anyways, it'll be no big deal." i cut her off as she tried to protest.

"a-ah, no! i'll be fine. if you want to go back, you can go."
a cute cat smile appeared, obviously trying to appease me. she only smiled at me like that when she wanted to appease me. but when she appeased (or tried to) me, i knew something wasn't right. i decided to leave the matter there, and ask jiwon-unnie to help me.

"ok, see you later."


"jiwon-unnie! i need help!" i called as i went through the front door. she met me in the kitchen, listening to my story. a small grin appeared on her face when i finished.

"do you REALLY not know why she was like that? tell me, honestly." she smirked.

"no! i really don't know! why are you smirking?" the smirk just made me even more confused. huh??? what was going on???

"it's alright, i'll talk to her for you."

"thanks, then." i replied, still feeling very confused.


mia pov
after a very nice afternoon with liz and emie, manager kim took me back home. i was flushed, hot and bothered, but happy.
when i got in, jiwon was waiting at the door for me, an unreadable look on her face.

"omo! w-what's wrong?" the blush fading, my eyebrows creasing in confusion.​
 
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main characters
mia
-a member of everglow
-aka eunji

emie
-aka nakyung
-met everglow for the first time when she went to yuehua with the choreo team to teach the choreo for pirate
-a choreographer leader nd a backup dancer for everglow

e:u
aka jiwon #1
-a member of everglow
-mia's unnie and the one she goes to for advice in the team

liz
aka jiwon #2
-a member of ive
-emie's best friend

supporting
sihyeon
-leader of everglow

onda
-aka serim
-member of everglow

aisha
-aka yurim
-member of everglow

yiren
-not so innocent maknae of everglow
-ships mia and emie

yujin
-leader of ive
-the one liz goes to for help when she needs it

leeseo
-aka hyunseo
-the young kid whom is lovable and wise at weird times
-maknae of ive​
oooo
 

ec.li.ps.e.138

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finally got around to reading this! it's nice! and especially for someone your age (don't take this the wrong way! i was a writer when i was 12) it's incredible! better than what i was writing that age i dare say (/lh/j). you've got hella potential as a writer. please keep doing it, man!

also this story is cute so far :)
 

najingter

when the flowers bloom beautifully and turned red
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Leeseo
Mia
Liz
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finally got around to reading this! it's nice! and especially for someone your age (don't take this the wrong way! i was a writer when i was 12) it's incredible! better than what i was writing that age i dare say (/lh/j). you've got hella potential as a writer. please keep doing it, man!

also this story is cute so far :)
Thanks gal ๐Ÿ˜ญ
 
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