i feel lonely and upset and js broken. i'm zoning out randomly and since therapy's stopped it's gotten worse again. everything feels wrong. even when i'm with my friends i feel lonely and broken, everything feels wrong. i have no clue what's going on and i'm having random panic attacks. i take hours to fall asleep and even when i do i'm crying. i wake up randomly in tears for no real damn reason. i'm smiling and all that but i feel like i'm lying to myself telling myself that i'll be fine and i'll be ok. my hands are shaky and i js don't get what's wrong with me. random panic attacks aren't helping either. and i've js become a whole lot more insecure as well and that ain't helping either. i literally love my friends so much but they aren't helping either and i can't bring myself to tell them what's going on. i js feel vulnerable and weak. it feels like how i was before i started therapy. i hated that version of myself and now i'm going back there again. i'm going back to hating myself, when i felt like everything was going good again and that things were gonna be ok it js had to get worse, first with my dad then someone on here, like is it that hard to let me be happy? i genuinely don't know what's going on, i hate this feeling and i feel unworthy again.