VENTING (Trigger warning)

[Mumi]

I'm sorry for the inconvenience I'm usually a happy person but I've been unable to cope for the past month since I have been unable to self harm and since I never have anyone to talk to its been difficult. I was at school camp so I couldn't cry myself to sleep either.

I already have enough stress from school and my anxiety and depression and my worries about my future but in my therapy session yesterday my therapist decided to bring up sexuality and gender which I haven't thought about and now I'm confused.

Not to mention my father is home and nothing I ever do is good enough for him, I wore sweatpants and a sweatshirt to camp as one outfit so I got a lecture on that outfit and how people would think we were poor. After that I got a lecture about the flower crown I wore with one of my outfits and how people would bully me for it.
Then I got a lecture about wearing shorts because that would show the boys that I 'wanted it'.
Not to mention the endless chores I've done today for him and I haven't gotten a single thank you.
And at camp how my friends told me I needed to be independent and do things for myself and how I was a burden and how I act like a child, all I did was ask them to fill up my water because I hurt my knee and couldn't walk.

Keep in mind I don't want pity points, I wrote this out to get it all out of my system.
I don't want attention, I don't want likes, I don't want remeasuring comments.
Thanks for reading I guess.

 

[myheartizomg]

Please keep in mind that no matter what you hear from anyone you are not, absolutely not a burden.
As a person who also suffers from a lot of anxiety and depression myself , I'm very happy you made this post and you didn't bring any inconvenience. This is how you feel and it's expected with all this unfair treatment. Getting it all out of your system is very needed.
My motto to such situations is 'this too shall pass' and it helps me, I don't know how much it would help you but I felt the need
to share it with you in case it makes you feel better. It's not always going to be like this.
From personal experience, I've also dealt with 'friends' who used to judge me for everything I was doing, well let me tell you that friends come and go and sooner or later you'll find the right people in your life. As for parents, well they stay but they have their reasons to be this way and you can't really understand them until you reach their age. This is how I see it.
My point is, take a deep breath, close your eyes and think that this too shall pass and that it's just a bad phase, not a bad life.
I really hope everything gets better soon, keep strong❤

 

[ᴀᴇꜱᴛʜᴇᴛɪᴄ ʙᴀᴇ]

I'm sorry for the inconvenience I'm usually a happy person but I've been unable to cope for the past month since I have been unable to self harm and since I never have anyone to talk to its been difficult. I was at school camp so I couldn't cry myself to sleep either.

I already have enough stress from school and my anxiety and depression and my worries about my future but in my therapy session yesterday my therapist decided to bring up sexuality and gender which I haven't thought about and now I'm confused.

Not to mention my father is home and nothing I ever do is good enough for him, I wore sweatpants and a sweatshirt to camp as one outfit so I got a lecture on that outfit and how people would think we were poor. After that I got a lecture about the flower crown I wore with one of my outfits and how people would bully me for it.
Then I got a lecture about wearing shorts because that would show the boys that I 'wanted it'.
Not to mention the endless chores I've done today for him and I haven't gotten a single thank you.
And at camp how my friends told me I needed to be independent and do things for myself and how I was a burden and how I act like a child, all I did was ask them to fill up my water because I hurt my knee and couldn't walk.

Keep in mind I don't want pity points, I wrote this out to get it all out of my system.
I don't want attention, I don't want likes, I don't want remeasuring comments.
Thanks for reading I guess.

Those aren't real freinds...

 

[ImJustKpopTrash]

People that treat you like that aren't real friends, i'd recommend getting rid of those people and finding other people because that's not how friends should treat you. And talking of a person who experiences anxiety and depression I completely understand how you're feeling, and you're never a burden to talk about your feelings. It's much better to get it out then to keep it in. And you said you didn't want any reassuring messages I know but sometimes it's just good to tell someone that there's other people out there for them and that people know what you're going through.

And sexuality is a really hard thing to deal with, don't stress too much about it. One day you'll figure it out, but the more you stress about it the harder it will be, what I'd say is to consider your feelings but not to a point where it stresses you out. Just everyday maybe think back on the day and what feelings you've had when. This won't last forever, it will get better, good luck. Keep going and keep staying strong there's people out there who love and care about you