That weird stigma around K-Pop

[Tachibugi]

This is just a bit of rambling, but I was looking through old messages/screenshots the other day from around the time I really got into kpop. And now I'm thinking about it- why the hell was I embarrassed at first and didn't really want to admit I liked it? My friend kept teasing me that I'm a kpop stan now and I kept denying it, of course it was all just for fun, but still, the fact that it even happened at all is just odd. Before I get into it, I was always soo sure about never liking it. And then I actually listened to it, and now we're here lmao.
I just think it is really wild how a fandom (the louder, toxic side to be more exact) can ruin something so much, you don't want to be associated with it. Online (well and irl too) I'm always avoiding any conflict, don't throw around any hate and because of that I sometimes didn't want to openly enjoy something- in case people think I'm a bad person for associating with a certain fandom.
At the same time, I have to say getting into kpop has changed me in that regard, I just enjoy whatever I want and I'm not ashamed of liking something because of the fandom's bad reputation.

But I am just really frustrated that it's a thing in the first place.
I've been listening to jpop for example for as long as I can remember, shared it with others, etc., but why, when it came to kpop I wanted to be secretive about it at first? And why do people get judged for it too? It's just music bruhh
The more I thought back, I realize how many times in videos I've watched that had nothing to do with kpop at all, someone would throw in a joke about kpop stans, about BTS, etc. and this has, even when I "disliked" kpop, always really annoyed me. Of course, complaining about toxic people in a fandom is fine, but when you turn it into making fun of someone for liking music or the idols making the music, it just seems like an excuse to bully someone. Same with making fun of the idols, saying the boys all look like girls, look gay, they all look the same, etc. People are just being anything-phobic and racist but hey it's okay it's just kpop right?? Oof.
Another thing, before getting into kpop, I would sometimes just watch/like fancams people posted without any reason under random Tweets, purely because people kept full-on bullying the people posting them... This has always been so hypocritical to me, since especially on Twitter, people will post anything under viral tweets, that has nothing to do with the tweets, like random videos/memes. So why, all of a sudden, the people posting their fancams, get all the hate??

And I also have to say, that after getting into kpop, I absolutely see even more why the fandom is so hated, BUT it's been so with so many fandoms I've been in. Some of them also have a similar reputation, hell for some (including kpop) I've seen people put that fandom in their DNI. How weird is that?? Imagine meeting someone irl, you find out they listen to kpop or watch a certain thing and you just walk away from them. It's really not that deep, people are allowed to have interests that you don't like.

But, on a more positive note, I've seen kpop becoming more and more "mainstream". Of course it is still a long way from really getting there, and never will be full-on mainstream (honestly I don't think I'd want it to be either), but I've been around from when this happened with Anime on the internet too (although all it brought was every single person misusing the word weeaboo now lmao). It's not really full-on mainstream, but so much more normal and talked about now. And the same I see with kpop, when I suddenly see a popular person talk about it, I'm always pleasantly surprised about it. (Or the whole Bang Chan and Ryan Reynolds situation, that was wild to witness happening in real time )

I guess all I have to say is stay positive, don't interact with hate and all that stuff...
Thankfully people on here, from what I've seen, are more chill and have some basic human decency of which a lot of people on Twitter could only dream of. It really has refreshed me being on here honestly, it's nice to see that such a peaceful site of the fandom exists too, kinda a restoration of my faith in the fandom. /lh

 

[yunaing]

I’m still ashamed I like Kpop today tbh. I think part of it is to do with my mum and her telling me no one wants to hear me talk about it. It feels sad to close off that part of my life to others though. Music is something very important to me and the fact I don’t allow myself to talk about my favourite groups or songs because I don’t want to bother them just… idk it feels a shame but there we go. It also makes me feel upset that when my friends told me they knew my favourite group was ITZY because I “talk about them a lot” (I swear I never say their name) or “I’m always listening to them” made me feel ashamed and like I’d failed..

But outside of that. I was recently joking with my friend about how I can tell people I know irl that I’m a lesbian easier than I can tell them I listen to Kpop. I think there’s defo elements of misogyny and racism when it comes to Kpop.
There is this trend in society that whatever teenage girls like is cringy and weird. Notice how football fans can spend hundreds attending matches, buying merch for their favourite groups, collecting football cards, and when their team loses they cause literal riots (this happens in the UK at least idk about other countries). But a group of teenage girls doing the same thing is obsessive and cringy (except I’ve never seen kpop stans causing riots in the streets coz idk their fave group didn’t win at MAMA but then again Kpop isn’t as big here as it is in like Asia so, maybe that has happened LOL).
And then as you mentioned, the boys get it the most with that they look gay or like women. People just feel comfortable degrading Asian celebrities for some reason. I’ve literally just been seeing stuff about the Met Gala whatever it’s called and how a Chinese singer was being called Jackson Wang and Jimin and shit. It’s embarrassing how often this happens.

But then ofc part of the reason why this is even bigger of a problem is the petty fanwars on Twitter. They do make us look bitter and genuinely quite cruel. People have mocked people’s deaths and shit and it just makes Kpop stans as a whole look insane. It’s the same way a lot of Kpop stans view ARMY and BLINK as insane, that’s just how we all look to outside eyes.

I had more I wanted to say but it’s slipped my mind now rip

 

[ᵇᵒʳᵃʰᵃᵉ_ᴮᵀˢ 樂⟭⟬]

ok that sued to happen to me


but now i embrace that label


i go to school with my BTS hoodie & once took my BTS backpack to school which got me a few stares from others (because they find it weird that a high-school student likes kpop) but yk what, fuck it

my classmates openly know that i like kpop & i could care less. my parents support me & like it (mum even went to see skz w me & my dad let me play it on a 2hr 30min car-ride back home)

 

[Tachibugi]

I’m still ashamed I like Kpop today tbh. I think part of it is to do with my mum and her telling me no one wants to hear me talk about it. It feels sad to close off that part of my life to others though. Music is something very important to me and the fact I don’t allow myself to talk about my favourite groups or songs because I don’t want to bother them just… idk it feels a shame but there we go. It also makes me feel upset that when my friends told me they knew my favourite group was ITZY because I “talk about them a lot” (I swear I never say their name) or “I’m always listening to them” made me feel ashamed and like I’d failed..

But outside of that. I was recently joking with my friend about how I can tell people I know irl that I’m a lesbian easier than I can tell them I listen to Kpop. I think there’s defo elements of misogyny and racism when it comes to Kpop.
There is this trend in society that whatever teenage girls like is cringy and weird. Notice how football fans can spend hundreds attending matches, buying merch for their favourite groups, collecting football cards, and when their team loses they cause literal riots (this happens in the UK at least idk about other countries). But a group of teenage girls doing the same thing is obsessive and cringy (except I’ve never seen kpop stans causing riots in the streets coz idk their fave group didn’t win at MAMA but then again Kpop isn’t as big here as it is in like Asia so, maybe that has happened LOL).
And then as you mentioned, the boys get it the most with that they look gay or like women. People just feel comfortable degrading Asian celebrities for some reason. I’ve literally just been seeing stuff about the Met Gala whatever it’s called and how a Chinese singer was being called Jackson Wang and Jimin and shit. It’s embarrassing how often this happens.

But then ofc part of the reason why this is even bigger of a problem is the petty fanwars on Twitter. They do make us look bitter and genuinely quite cruel. People have mocked people’s deaths and shit and it just makes Kpop stans as a whole look insane. It’s the same way a lot of Kpop stans view ARMY and BLINK as insane, that’s just how we all look to outside eyes.

I had more I wanted to say but it’s slipped my mind now rip

This!! (to all of this!)
It's so wild how kpop is almost a taboo thing at some points My parents definitely made fun of me for liking kpop at first, even though now I got my mother into it too, but she still kinda judges me for getting albums. How is buying a kpop album any different from another album? Plus, they're just so much cooler, there's so much stuff in them?

The football fans, ooooh god. It's similar in Germany where you have to watch where to go if you're in a bigger city during football times at night and especially on trains, they can be so annoying and rude. But that's just how it is, I guess, but how dare people be fans of kpop lmao

The fact in this day and age there's still so much racism is insane, and how normalized it is in the case of those big events. Same with actors, I'm not really into movies/shows a lot (well other than dramas, mostly jdramas though) but the things I see from Hollywood when something is trending every now and then is just as annoying.

And yeah honestly the fanwars has always been one of the things that frustrated me the most, although those also happen in other music fandoms. It's just something that makes no sense, your favs most of the time are besties of big fans of the people you insult, so like?? Why are you fighting with people over who to like?? And even if they aren't, why would you do it in the first place, do you want there to only exist one single kpop band and that's it or what?? Honestly people on Twitter are so confusing, like it actually hurts just thinking about all the weird drama I've seen on there..

 

[yunaing]

Oh yeah I remember the other thing I wanted to say now.

I also find the whole “dni fandom” thing weird because online sure it kinda works but irl it would just be weird. I hardly know shit about boy groups and I have a friend who doesn’t really care much for girl groups and maybe online our paths would never cross but we’ve become pretty good friends irl now and are seeing Twice together LOL. I think it’s a bit of a shame to discount an entire fandom of people just because of some bad experiences. I can understand it can be triggering for some so I’m not trying to ignore that, coz there would defo be some fandoms I’d be wary of befriending. But like irl if I meet a Kpop fan they could fucking hate ITZY but as long as they’re not being a crybaby about it we can be besties for all I care So if only people on twt acted more mature like that then maybe our umbrella fandom could be a little less known for toxicity. But alas

 

[Tachibugi]

ok that sued to happen to me


but now i embrace that label


i go to school with my BTS hoodie & once took my BTS backpack to school which got me a few stares from others (because they find it weird that a high-school student likes kpop) but yk what, fuck it

my classmates openly know that i like kpop & i could care less. my parents support me & like it (mum even went to see skz w me & my dad let me play it on a 2hr 30min car-ride back home)

That's also often the thing, when you're past the thing of not wanting someone to know, you notice people don't actually care too much (well or they're judgmental at first but then it's just alright then sfkghj)

 

[Tachibugi]

Oh yeah I remember the other thing I wanted to say now.

I also find the whole “dni fandom” thing weird because online sure it kinda works but irl it would just be weird. I hardly know shit about boy groups and I have a friend who doesn’t really care much for girl groups and maybe online our paths would never cross but we’ve become pretty good friends irl now and are seeing Twice together LOL. I think it’s a bit of a shame to discount an entire fandom of people just because of some bad experiences. I can understand it can be triggering for some so I’m not trying to ignore that, coz there would defo be some fandoms I’d be wary of befriending. But like irl if I meet a Kpop fan they could fucking hate ITZY but as long as they’re not being a crybaby about it we can be besties for all I care So if only people on twt acted more mature like that then maybe our umbrella fandom could be a little less known for toxicity. But alas

Bruhhh yes exactly I'm just so frustrated about the people ruining a fandoms reputation so much. I have friends that have completely different interests outside of some we share too and I couldn't care less, I even love them telling me about it and me telling them about the stuff I love. I mean, that's how I got people into certain games or bands too kfjghfjg
But I get DNI if it's for antis and stuff, so you don't want negativity about a band you like, but just for liking a band you don't like? The fact some people can be so toxic that people don't want to associate with anyone in that fandom is wild..

 

[Call_MeRover]

I used to be ashamed i liked Kpop.and i started listening to it at a young age(thanks dad).And when my friends talked about anime, they ALWAYS.BROUGHT.UOP.BTS.and everyone would look at me and i would get embarrassed.But now i know what kind of music i liked and im not confused like how i used to be.And at school there are a small few that like n listen to Kpop so now i dont feel as much alone.On the forums as well, everyone actually has "Human deciency" and seems to have similar interests which makes everyday coming here better than the last.