rant?

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strawkeeds

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i posted a little about this already, but the day jonghyun decided to take his own life is nearing. constantly reading his letter reminds me that as of this year i have not gave back in a way i wanted to. if anything is going on and you have no one to talk to feel free to leave a reply to this. if you want sad songs/artist, something good recently happened,you just finished a new drama or stanning a new group, or you just want to conversate that is fine as well lol. i just think everyone deserves to at least have a place to go when things are going both well and poorly. (btw this is my first time posting one of these so sorry for any mistakes lmao goodnight/good morning)
37917
 

SmolBeanAsh

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i posted a little about this already, but the day jonghyun decided to take his own life is nearing. constantly reading his letter reminds me that as of this year i have not gave back in a way i wanted to. if anything is going on and you have no one to talk to feel free to leave a reply to this. if you want sad songs/artist, something good recently happened,you just finished a new drama or stanning a new group, or you just want to conversate that is fine as well lol. i just think everyone deserves to at least have a place to go when things are going both well and poorly. (btw this is my first time posting one of these so sorry for any mistakes lmao goodnight/good morning)
View attachment 37917
I remember right around Thanksgiving was when I first got into K-pop, my biggest groups at the time were BTS, Twice, Blackpink, and Shinee. I remember waking that morning at my dad's house (because due to custody reasons i went to see him on weekends) and asking to play Roblox on his phone and while I waas playing I got a message on Amino. It was from my best friend (we are still best friends if you were wondering) and she had sent me a text that I didn't read until after i clicked the link to a CNN article. The article had informed me that Jonghyun had passed away. I don't think i cried right away because I was in shock, but later while calling my best friend we both started crying. For me, it was a big loss because I had just started stanning them and he was my bias in Shinee. I was still a little kid and I didn't really know how to deal with something like this because this was the first time somebody that was important in my life had died.
 

strawkeeds

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I remember right around Thanksgiving was when I first got into K-pop, my biggest groups at the time were BTS, Twice, Blackpink, and Shinee. I remember waking that morning at my dad's house (because due to custody reasons i went to see him on weekends) and asking to play Roblox on his phone and while I waas playing I got a message on Amino. It was from my best friend (we are still best friends if you were wondering) and she had sent me a text that I didn't read until after i clicked the link to a CNN article. The article had informed me that Jonghyun had passed away. I don't think i cried right away because I was in shock, but later while calling my best friend we both started crying. For me, it was a big loss because I had just started stanning them and he was my bias in Shinee. I was still a little kid and I didn't really know how to deal with something like this because this was the first time somebody that was important in my life had died.
i have stanned kpop for years so older groups like toppdogg,superjunior,2ne1,bts, were all groups i stanned at the time. i knew of shinee but i did not stan them. around December 19th my friend (who had gotten me into kpop)told me someone died on my birthday. i did not stan shinee so i just walked passed it after saying how sad it was. a little while after i finally started to stan shinee without realizing that was the person who had died. (i was super dumb and just watched variety shows so i didnt know until my birthday) when a kpop fan was like "im so sorry to cry on ur birthday but jonghyun died today" explaining how sad she was. then i recognized the name. i read the letter over and over ( i really could relate at the time) and that was how i figured out. because at the time i related i respected his opinion and choice. living in constant sadness w/ no solution and living for other people is what he did. he expressed that it was a selfish decision which i think i accepted it more. he deserves to be selfish and do something for himself at least once. this is the sad truth that i had to cope with reality. it still affects me in the present because i only saw him in the past. i never got to see the things he did in the present because i did not stan shinee at the time. there is my rant i did not intend to write. but jonghyun died as an noble admirable human being.
 

Kiyoshi

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Ravi
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Shinwon
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I used to write letters to Jonghyun... I would read them aloud to him, and I thought he was watching over me, because I had... Really sever depression... I still have them under my bed... I miss him so much.
 

strawkeeds

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texas
I used to write letters to Jonghyun... I would read them aloud to him, and I thought he was watching over me, because I had... Really sever depression... I still have them under my bed... I miss him so much.
i get that sm! at times i think "i wonder if he hears me or if what im going through was nearly as bad as him" i lovee voicing my emotions through writing. it is how i got rid of my depression (i also had it really bad and therapist did not help much)
 
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